Do not get down on your self in case you have a behavior of obsessing over crushes—Web page notes that we’re all prone to it.
“Once we’re obsessive about any individual, they turn into the supply of our value and our lovability, so it turns into vastly essential to us,” he explains, including, “They have one thing, whether or not it is magnificence, or intelligence, or confidence, that we really feel we do not have, so we have to get their approval, their love, and their curiosity.”
And often, Web page tells mindbodygreen, we wind up right here due to our distinctive “myths of misplaced love,” that are the myths we stock from our earliest years, once we did not obtain love the best way we felt we wanted to from dad and mom, caregivers, or the world.
Within the folks we obsess over, we’re in search of a option to show our value, to search out that “misplaced love” we expect we do not have or by no means bought, however it in the end leaves us wanting, as a result of self-worth can solely be given to ourselves by ourselves.
And if it is any comfort, you may, in a way, be “addicted,” or on the very least dependent, on an individual. In a single small 2010 examine, topics who had simply gone by means of a breakup however had been nonetheless in love confirmed simply how true that’s: After they noticed images of their ex, the mind’s reward system launched dopamine, the neurotransmitter that performs an enormous position within the early phases of affection and dependancy.
All that to say, obsession is actual, however so is recovering from it.